A Chicken, Boobs and a Butt. Oh My.

September 25, 2011 in Me and My Public Self,Stuff I Should Think About Regretting Later

So, this weekend I didn’t curse as much as I normally enjoy.  I had some young, impressionable minds around me, and well…I’m not what most people want impressionizing their children.  So I tried to act right for as long as I could.  But we all know…that didn’t last long.

And don’t look that word up.  You won’t find it but you know what I mean.

Anyway.

I love a local festival.  Love it.  It’s where you see the best and the worst.  And everything known to man is on a stick.

I decide I wanna go and am taking my nieces with me.  Sucker.

Hailey is almost 11 and Hanna is almost 12.  Right on the cusp of womanhood.  Uh, huh.  Mood swings, a little boobage, hen-pecking everything to death.  They truly think they know everything.  About everything.  And I can tell they make the crap up when they don’t.

They just don’t know…Aunt Carrie was them long before they were them.  And Aunt Carrie is good at it.

Saturday afternoon, we’re in the car and it’s quiet.  Too quiet for me.  They trade glares for no reason at each other.  And that’s when I knew…this AIN’T happening.

Me:  “Ok.  There’s one rule for today.  The rule is “we laugh.”  You heard me, we’re going to freaking laugh whether you want to or not.  Fake it if you have to, but your asses are gonna laugh.”

They are now glaring at me.  And Hailey proceeds to correct me on my language.  I glare back.

Hailey:  “Aunt Carrie, that is dumb.  Nobody fake laughs.  Stupid.”

Oh, hell to the no.  She did not.

Me:  “You don’t think?  How’s this?”

And I bellow out the most asinine, hillbilly laugh I can muster.  I kept it up till they had no choice but to play along so I’d shut up.  So they start up with theirs.

After about 3.8 seconds, they are howling.  Not the fake one…it’s real.  We all are.  It now hurts and we can’t stop.

I won.

I see one of those Halloween costume stores that pop up only at this time of year.  I couldn’t pass it up.  Couldn’t.  Well, I could’ve…but really?

It was in the walls of this store I heard what is music to my ears.

Both of them:  “Aunt Carrie, you are crazy! You’re awesome!”

And I heard it more than once, mind you.

Here’s a little glimpse of what brought those words into my world:

 I couldn’t help it.  It was there and I was there.  One of my prouder moments.
You know who you are.
One’s doing ‘shrooms and one’s pimpin’.  My heart swells.
Why, yes.  I do tan in the nude, thank you.
I had to beg them to leave after an hour.  Beg.  You heard me.  Beg.
They cackled the whole time.  Completely forgot they were so “mature and womanly” and Aunt Carrie was so uncool.
We made it to the festival downtown and did lots of festivally stuff.  Especially sweating.  A festival ain’t a festival without some sweat.  It’s the only thing I couldn’t find on a stick, but believe me it was there.
We sat on the curb and laughed until people started stopping and laughing with us.  We were high on kettle corn and blue cotton-candy.  Hallucinations kind of high.  We took turns taking photos and laughing at the finished product.  Which only proved, none of us has a clue how to take iPhone pics.
As you’ll now see:
Hailey’s attempt.
Hanna’s attempt.
And finally, Aunt Carrie got it right.
I’ll never let them know, but I learn way more from them then they ever will me.  Ever.
Simply put:  Live a life you love.
Jennifer September 29, 2011 at 1:41 am

You are crazy awesome.

Jennifer September 30, 2011 at 12:04 am

Holla! Check out your new site.

Peta September 30, 2011 at 9:08 am

Every child needs a crazy Aunt/grandmother/friend to teach them to be crazy. childhood rules demand it.

Carrie September 30, 2011 at 11:10 am

I am SO glad to see someone agrees with me! Now we gotta convince my sister this is so totally normal!

Wait. Not normal. I never consider myself normal. =)

shan October 2, 2011 at 8:11 am

right?! :-)

Karyn Pyle October 1, 2011 at 6:46 am

I’m with you, my kid teaches me so much every day, but Ill never tell. To tell would be to give them power, and we can’t have that! Your day looks like a blast.
Karyn Pyle recently posted..New Years Resolution – Starting In OctoberMy Profile

Deborah October 1, 2011 at 9:34 am

Remember when my cousin Gina saw you once. I think it was near Dairy Queen and she asked my Mom if that was “Deborah’s friend with the clown hair” or something like that???? HAHAHAHHAHA
Deborah recently posted..Today She Is 5 – Update on PurityMy Profile

Carrie October 1, 2011 at 1:50 pm

You, if anyone should know…some things just never change.

THANK GOD!!

shan October 2, 2011 at 8:12 am

the iphone 4 has a camera turn around thing so you can see your photos. it’s in the upper right hand corner.

Carrie October 2, 2011 at 8:35 am

The iPhone 4 is coming up on my list of next things-to-buy-that-I’ll-never-fully-understand-how-to-operate.

shan October 2, 2011 at 9:54 am

yeah, it was a gift. i honestly have very little clue on how to use it but i do know about the “front facing cam”… it’s pretty neat. :-)

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