10 things I know because life thought I needed to know.

October 28, 2011 in Crap I Was Considerate Enough to Not Bother You with Before Now.,The Very Few Times I'll Admit to Having a Soul

In no particular order, I know…

1.  …a woman should never cramp or cry at the office.  Then expect respect.

2.  …the difference between a thong, a g-string and boy briefs.  And the thrill of a perfect bra.

3.  …how disheartening it is every time someone calls me “ma’am.”

4.  …the vital importance of telling a girlfriend she has lipstick on her front tooth.

5.  …that contrary to what most magazines would lead you to believe, very few women are turned on by the super-muscley gym-freak.

6.  …the appropriate hemline and heel height for the occasion.

7.  …how to ask politely.  Rather than barking orders.

8.  …why you should exfoliate.  And never go to bed with your makeup on.

9.  …sincerity trumps a smart-ass remark every time.

10. …when you look totally awful, it’s inevitable you will run into your worst female enemy or that guy you have a huge crush on.  On a really bad day, both.

Chime in.  Your turn.

I know there’s stuff you know that I probably want to know.

Karyn October 28, 2011 at 8:36 pm

Oh but I LOVE the ma’am! The ma’am is my favorite!

I concur heartily with the rest. You should also know that you cannot argue with a crazy person, its a lose-lose situation and if you try you may end up belonging in the loony bin with them.
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Carrie October 28, 2011 at 8:48 pm

Ma’am is just so…so…ma’am-ish though.

I’ll take, “Excuse me, miss…” anyday.

Yes! Totally agree on the arguing stuff, too. So, I just don’t. Sooner or later, they always realize I’m right anyway.

=)

Peggy Sterling Scarborough October 28, 2011 at 8:40 pm

Life thought I needed to know: ‘when in doubt, don’t’…

I’m always,
Rowdy

Carrie October 28, 2011 at 8:49 pm

Uh, huh. There are a few “don’ts” I shouldn’t have done.

OK. Maybe more than a few.

Joan @chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate October 29, 2011 at 8:13 am

Carrie, I gave up on the Ma’am a long time ago, being in the south, the “yes ma’am” comes at about age 20, so in my 40’s I finally over it, lol.

If you can’t say anything nice, keep your mouth shut (and just hope they get hit by a truck!)

Hugs girl!
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Carrie October 29, 2011 at 8:55 am

Oh, I know. I’m probably the worst at using it, too. I use it ALL the time.

But when a little 20-something rings me up at the grocery store and says, “Ma’am, did you find everything you need?” I cringe.

But it’s a good cringe. With the way some are now days, I’m lucky it’s not, “Bitch, what else you want?”

=)

jennyonthespot October 29, 2011 at 3:32 pm

YES. x 10… INDEED!
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Carrie October 29, 2011 at 4:32 pm

God only knows that list of things I “don’t know” is a trillion miles long.

Wait. More like it’s that list of things I ACT LIKE I “don’t know.”

D'Anna Lundstrom October 30, 2011 at 3:35 pm

Can’t put a dollar sign on a piece of mind.

Be content with what you are good at and don’t waste time trying to be something you’re not.

In every situation be present because you cannot get it back.

Self deception is slavery and will never allow you freedom.

A boring day is way under rated.

If you are going to pray for something, expect that God may give it to you in an unexpected way.

I could go on and on and on and on…but I will shut up!

Carrie October 30, 2011 at 4:15 pm

Good stuff there. Way good stuff.

I especially like the one on a boring day being under-rated. Boring is fabulous…boring is great…boring is so needed sometimes.

Amen.

mark @ yelling near you October 30, 2011 at 8:08 pm

I’m out of my league here. 10 is true both ways though – that’s for sure.
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Jane November 1, 2011 at 11:13 am

#4 Lippy is so, so true – it should/must be made law
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Carrie November 1, 2011 at 11:17 am

Totally agree. Cause goodness knows…we’ve ALL had THAT happen. And at the most opportune time, no doubt. =)

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