I’m way past the point in life to where I envy much.
Except for those damn women who can eat like a linebacker and yet somehow still stay a size 6.
Without ever breaking a sweat. Ever.
I’m not a morning person. I live alone. And even when I was married, my mornings consisted of no more than:
1. Hit the snooze
2. Hit the snooze
3. Hit the snooze
4. Furiously stomp into the bathroom to get dressed
5. Furiously stomp back into the bedroom to turn off the alarm I forgot to turn off when I slung the covers off and said “damn it” out loud and got out of bed
6. Furiously stomp back into the bathroom to finish getting dressed
7. Furiously stomp out of the bathroom dressed
8. Get in the car
9. Stop and get gas, of course
10. Go to work
No words, no coffee, no nothing.
By about 10:00 am though, I am ready to be the life of the party. And life is a total party for the rest of the day.
The other morning while stopped at a light in the drizzling rain, I was checking my lipstick and glaring at my stupid hair in the mirror.
(Key word here is drizzle.)
(I wish I had the balls to wear wigs some days.)
Of course, I was at the longest light in the southern states since I was running late and I notice this guy standing by the bus stop. And he’s dancing with his umbrella.
I’m not talking snapping his fingers or bobbing his head. I’m talking he was totally busting-a-move in the best busting-a-move way I have seen in ages.
In the drizzle.
Since I’m not a morning person, I was barking at my purse while I was grabbing for my phone to get a shot of him in action.
Crap was all up in my way…wallet, some stupid ass receipt I kept for no reason, gum, that big Altoids tin, a wrapped pad that is now coming unwrapped but yet still in there, lotion too big for purse size, my passport, all kinds of just crap.
(Yeah. My passport.)
(Like I’m gonna just hop a plane to France on any given day.)
But I got my phone just as he was finishing up his moves. He had already closed up his umbrella but I got what I could get.
(And the friggin light was still red.)
And after seeing him, for a moment I thought to myself:
“Now, why can’t you be just half that much of a morning person? Life would be so much more enjoyable. You have so much to be happy about. You have been blessed with a life others might even envy. So, take on his attitude. And dance. And dance when you least likely feel like it. Dance because you have so much to dance about.”
Then the light turned green.
And I honked at the car in front of me.