Sometimes funny just happens. But this ain’t funny.

July 24, 2012 in The Very Few Times I'll Admit to Having a Soul

I don’t ever really try for funny.  More than anything I just do my best to keep it real.

Just keep it real as best I can.

Today?  There’s no funny.  At least not for me.  There really hasn’t been since that midnight showing last week.

I think I’m officially old.

For the first time in my life, I heard myself say outloud, “What the hell is wrong with these kids these days?”

My momma used to say that.

(Daddy just shook his head.)

And when she did…in my mind (and I say ‘in my mind’ because momma didn’t raise a fool) I replied with some immature, asinine, mouthy-teenagery comment of, “It’s you old people that’s what is wrong with us.  You’re all driving us over the edge.  Get off our backs.”

(Because I knew everything and had all the answers.)

So, if I’m saying now what my momma said when she was “old”…that means I’m a friggin fossil.  Because I do believe I was around 13 when I remember momma saying that stuff and so that would have made her around 33.

Old.

I’m 43.

Jokes on me now, huh?

Anyway.

The most my momma and daddy had to worry about with me while I was growing up was stuff like:

Roughing up the younger sisters.  Till they screamed for help.

Skipping school with friends and floating down the creek with no sunscreen then coming home crispy and telling them I’m crispy because we played softball in PE.

Sneaking on too much makeup after leaving for school.

Cheating on my stupid algebra tests that to this day I’ve never needed that stupid crap for.

Coming home 72 sheets to the wind because a friend and I buried a bottle of Jim Beam in the woods across from her house then went out and dug it up one Friday night.

Looking out the back window of our uncool wood-paneled station wagon trying to look smooth as a 12 year old smoking a fake candy cigarette that I was sure the cars passing would think was real.  Then eating it.

Pointing at things with my middle finger but swearing I was just using it as a pointer.

Sneaking out of a friends house on a Saturday night and driving 30 minutes down the road to see the midnight showing of Rocky Horror Picture Show.  And with a toy gun at that.

So, in light of things that have recently happened:  Momma and Daddy, I’m sorry.

I’m sorry I made you worry.  I’m sorry I made you cry.  I’m sorry I made you shake your head and wonder where you went wrong.  I’m sorry there were times you were sure you had failed.

And, in light of things that have recently happened:  Momma and Daddy, I thank you.

I thank you for teaching me how to embrace my struggles and not cause others to suffer instead.  I thank you for teaching me  the importance of tolerance and accepting the fact that only I can make me a better me.  I thank you for teaching me how to love others in spite of themselves.

Also, in light of things that have recently happened:  Mr. and Mrs. Holmes, for you I pray.

kk July 24, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Amen.

Carrie July 24, 2012 at 4:37 pm

The world needs lots more of that.

katie metzroth July 24, 2012 at 9:56 pm

agreed.
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Jennifer July 24, 2012 at 2:07 pm

Why Ms. Carrie, you have gone and made me cry.
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Carrie July 24, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Well, I don’t like to cry alone, sister. =)

Barbara July 24, 2012 at 2:25 pm

You said it all. Beautifully, I might add.
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Carrie July 24, 2012 at 4:38 pm

Thank you, sweet girl. That means a lot.

Toni July 24, 2012 at 4:56 pm

Bravo, my friend!! (o ;

Carrie July 24, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Thank you, Toni. I’m thrilled you stopped by here. =)

Chrissy July 24, 2012 at 5:10 pm

First, well said; second, love the pictures and thirdly, times have changed so drastically from when we were teenagers!

Carrie July 24, 2012 at 5:48 pm

That’s for sure. Things are pretty unrecognizable at times.

Mamarific July 24, 2012 at 5:18 pm

Oh, you said it so well. Times, they are a-changin’, that’s for sure. I am scared that I brought children into this awful world, sometimes. Love the vintage pics of you. And I totally did the candy cigarette thing, too!
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Carrie July 24, 2012 at 5:49 pm

Just love on those babies as much as you can.

Then a little more.

Mandy July 24, 2012 at 6:35 pm

WTF?!?! Did mamarific just say ‘vintage pics’????? I’ll have her know YOU (really meaning ME since we are less than a month apart in age) are NOT VINTAGE!!!!! :)

I am just amazed that back in the day (sounds much better than ‘vintage’) we could take PLASTIC Machine water guns to the theater and noone thought a thing about it. Now days, freaks out there take the real thing! I don’t get it! And, you were able to put into words what we’ve all been thinking!

Love you Red,
Mandy

Carrie July 24, 2012 at 6:43 pm

She did say vintage…but you know I like me some groovy retro vintage-y stuff! Remember, I’m the hippie in the group.

And yes, it’s a sad day when what used to be just plain ol’fun has turned to violence and harm.

Love you tons.

Lisa Guedry July 24, 2012 at 8:23 pm

And driving too damn fast in the little blue corolla hatchback! Good times…..

Carrie July 24, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Yikes!

Yeah, that too.

=)

Connie Weiss July 25, 2012 at 9:12 am

I’m still trying to wrap my brain around all of this. What the heck went wrong?

And I agree. The Holmes family….they must be hurting terribly and wondering the same thing.
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Carrie July 25, 2012 at 11:59 am

I just can’t imagine. And really, I feel for the victims. And his poor parents have to be just lost in all this.

angelika July 25, 2012 at 10:28 am

I live about 30 miles from where it all went down. Just a very sad, sad time for this state and our nation. No rhyme or reason for any of it…just pure sadness.
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Carrie July 25, 2012 at 12:00 pm

Your last sentence says it all: No rhyme or reason for any of it…just pure sadness.

This proves there are just some things in life we’ll never, ever understand.

Maggie S. July 25, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Your timing is impeccable. You may have saved the very lives and futures of two 15 year old girls by reminding me to look at the big picture.
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Carrie July 25, 2012 at 1:48 pm

Trust me…your girls will be just fine. My poor folks spent many days and nights banging their heads on the walls, throwing their hands up and hanging their heads.

But it’s because of who THEY are that I became who I am. They never gave up and they never tossed me aside.

And goodness knows…they prayed. Lots.

And it must’ve worked. I’ve made it through my adult life fairly unscathed.

Maren July 26, 2012 at 8:26 am

Well this was beautiful to read. I’m sure that many of the questions and thoughts people have over there are the same ones we had here after the massacre last year. It never makes sense. It seems like evil has no bounds. All we can do is never to give in to it, I believe.
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Carrie July 26, 2012 at 9:12 am

Thank you, Maren. And I do think you’re right. Evil has no bounds and seems to show up in the least likely places.

Bailey July 31, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Beautifully written. I used to do the same thing with candy cigarettes!
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Carrie August 6, 2012 at 5:47 pm

LOVED me some candy cigarettes. God, I thought I was so cool.

What a freak.

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