Crap I Was Considerate Enough to Not Bother You with Before Now.

Being barky can be good but being nice so someone else can be nice is better. So, there.

May 16, 2013
Beyonce-Sonic

I don’t normally tell people what to do. (Except every day of my life.)  (But I’m not bossy.  I just know what they should be doing.) So you can take this little ditty or leave it:  When you’re barky…be nice. (Even when you don’t want to be.) (Like me.)  (The “don’t want to be part.”) I […]

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Not much has changed unless you consider totally remodeling life as ‘change.’

April 22, 2013
Family Pic

Apparently, it’s true. I can’t do two things at once.  Those two things being: 1.  Life B.  Blogging I know.  Lame.  I get it.  Grow up.  Be a real woman.  Suck it up and multi-task.  Yeah.  Sure.  Uh, huh. Not a whole lot has happened since I last did this blog thing back in 1972. […]

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I might not have kids but I’ll embarrass them anyway. And others as well. But I can take it, too.

August 28, 2012

Sometimes I embarrass my family. (OK.  Maybe more than ‘sometimes’…maybe.) Because I told people on Facebook this was my family:   And it’s not. That right there is good stuff to me.  Really good stuff. And I probably even embarrass the kids I don’t have.  Because I put this on Facebook yesterday: And the kids can […]

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Roofers and an earthquake I can tackle. Small, buggish things in the night? Not so much.

August 14, 2012

I’m a pretty hard sleeper.  Most of the time. Or so I thought. I’ve slept through a crew of dudes re-roofing the house at 6:00 am…I’ve slept through a screaming alarm I forgot to turn off the night before…I’ve slept through a slight earthquake when the rest of the hotel guests were up and roaming around in […]

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Yes, I deserve to be punched in the neck but don’t because I kinda have some excuses.

August 6, 2012

I know, I know.  Get off my back.  It’s been ages. Somebody punch me in the neck or something.  Where have I been?  What is wrong with me?!? I know. I’ve been…well, busy. Good busy…but busy. I’m just gonna throw out a random sampling of things that have either been going on, happening, making me […]

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I didn’t die. But I could have and wanted to. However, the week ain’t over yet.

July 19, 2012

It was 1999. Or 1998.  Wait.  Maybe it was 2000. I don’t know.  I just do know I remember praying to die.  Or wishing to die.  Wait.  Maybe I did die. I don’t know. But I do know it was Christmas.  And I was in Houston.  And momma was 2 hours away.  And I was […]

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Not much to report other than lots of hoopin’ and hollerin’. And well, I might’ve grown a beard.

June 15, 2012

In all my 43 years, not once do I remember being called “low-key.” Or “subtle.” Or “tranquil.” Or “serene.” SO WHY START NOW? First.  ‘Dallas’. I literally turded on the floor when I realized JR was shot 32 YEARS AGO. (Yeah.  Turded.) (I know.  I’m a picture of class.) If anyone would have simply said, […]

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What does Britney and The Fairy Hobmother have in common, you ask? Uh, me. That’s what.

June 1, 2012

Apparently doing The X Factor taping last week wore me out. I’ve been pretty lazy and worthless lately. I mean, it’s taken me a whole friggin’ week to post this: I know it’s not much…but a little of Britney goes a long way. A really long way. (Yes.  The same has been said about moi.) ‘Diva’ […]

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Don’t assume I get high because I have a heavy twang.

April 13, 2012

It is really no secret I have an accent. Ok.  A twang. And it’s heavy. I know this. Usually the first words I hear after meeting someone for the first time is, “Oh, my goodness you have that Texas twang.” No shit. I’ve lived here in Texas all my life.  Except for about 6 weeks […]

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Urban Dictionary, where have you been all my life?

March 22, 2012

I’m not sure just where I’ve been for the last who-knows-how-many years, but I apparently haven’t taken full advantage of the exciting possibilities Urban Dictionary allows me. I fully intend to make up that valuable lost time. I will be the first to admit:  I might have a somewhat strange use of words at times. […]

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