Think you’re gonna be necking at my house? Think again, Mr.-I’m-So-Perfect-at-Being-Perfect.

July 28, 2014
Cayla Job

Yes.  We bought an RV. I will be in a big, floppy hat most every weekend from now on. Keith will be in his mandals more than I ever in my life imagined I’d tolerate. And you’re sick of hearing about the RV and how Keith isn’t too hip on the idea of me plucking down pink flamingo yard […]

11 comments Read the full article →

Always, always make it worse than it really is because then it ain’t so bad when it ain’t that bad.

July 25, 2014
Chore List

You know how when you think something is really bad then you find out it’s not as bad as you thought so then the original bad-ness ain’t so bad? OK, I’ll try it again. Let’s say I come in with a new pair of heels.  Clacking all around the kitchen and all over the living […]

13 comments Read the full article →

I always think it can’t get any worse and then I realize what an ass is in Spanish.

July 21, 2014
Spanish Words

Sweet mother of all things travel-ly-ish, I have been on the road way too much for me. First, back home to see family and friends for the weekend only to be fashionably traumatized by my dude wearing his mandals on most of the trip. (Mandals = Man Sandals.  Get it?) About 2 days after that little […]

17 comments Read the full article →

I didn’t plan this confession but I’ve been to prison and I’m going back. There. Secret is out.

July 9, 2014
Orange is the New Black

I don’t watch much TV. There. Secret is out. I have no time for it. What?  Between bitching about a hormonal teenager who has done nothing but complain about having so-called cabin fever even though she just got back from 8 glorious, fun-filled days in Florida to losing my mind by pretending I’m June Cleaver […]

20 comments Read the full article →

…and this is why you’ll probably ask yourself later, “Hmmm…why is she posting her resume’?”

July 2, 2014
Signs 1

Because the office sent out an email. And I responded. Which was my first mistake. I’ve worked with these people for nine heavenly years so they know me like a well-read-then-thoughtlessly-discarded-and-tossed-on-a-dusty-bookshelf-then-later-pulled-back-out-to-read-with-delight-again book. It’s their own fault if they’re ever shocked, surprised or caught off guard. Nothing should ever surprise them. (Sweet Mother of Corporate America…come on!  Nine years!) Though […]

22 comments Read the full article →

The other night we walked for two years. And I have yet to break a sweat.

June 19, 2014

Just as I’m closing up the laptop the other night and clicking off the bedside lamp, this came forth into the universe. Me:  Don’t forget we have a date next Saturday night, June 28th, for the two-year anniversary of our first date. Keith:  Ok.  It’s a date for the two-year anniversary of our first date? Me:  Yes. Keith:  So, we’re having […]

23 comments Read the full article →

We have heroes and we have daddy’s and if we’re lucky…they’re one in the same.

June 12, 2014

You have military heroes. You have world leader heroes.  You have sports heroes. You have celebrity heroes. You have all kinds. I have my Daddy. He lived in a house with mom and us 3 girls.   That’s a lot of estrogen. For years, he had a “panty drawer”.  Why?  Because little girls wear panties and when the clothes were washed, […]

18 comments Read the full article →

A good Daddy will always do what he has to do…even if it means doing it alone.

June 9, 2014
Keith Cayla Softball

He said the minute he held her, he knew his reason for being: To be her daddy. They married young.  He was in law enforcement and she was a young professional. For years in their marriage, she struggled with an unbeatable addiction to prescription medication.  It was the skeleton in their closet.  He did his best to […]

24 comments Read the full article →

Just discovered my teenager doesn’t understand me. Well, there’s a news flash.

June 4, 2014
Messy Room

Allow me to quote my 16-year-old teenager as I was driving her home from the college accounting class she’s taking and continuously gripes about but yet won’t shut her trap about the frat boy that’s in there and how even though she’s the youngest it’s not as hard as she thought it’d be but still though….her […]

8 comments Read the full article →

I always win. Even when she’s a jerk and mouthy and makes me want to punch her in the gut. I always win.

May 29, 2014
Me and Cayla

My girl had her 16th birthday back in mid-May. She’s a teenager, so as you can imagine, we experience a bit of drama-queen crap every now and then. More ‘now’ than ‘then’. This was one of those ‘now’ and also one of those ‘then’ times.  A double-dose of the drivel. In a very authoritative voice […]

18 comments Read the full article →