I guess it’s safe to assume the honeymoon is over because I’m back to bitching and he’s on the commode.

January 17, 2014

Apparently, for my dear husband, Keith…the honeymoon is over. And ok.  Maybe a little for me, too. Last weekend, I was alone. A. LONE. Him and Cayla did some bonding.  Went hunting or camping or whatever.  I didn’t really care.  I just knew I was going to be a-totally-lone for a full weekend.  And that’s all […]

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I am loved and I are smart. All thanks to a friggin’ marsupial.

December 25, 2013
Taboo 2

Because when your in-laws come to your house for the holidays, you can yammer just so much about other family members, Duck Dynasty and Facebook…you play games. Or eat more ham. (Which I am totally over at this point.) I’m sure it’s not hard to imagine, but I play to win.  Losing ain’t an option.  […]

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I don’t care how strong the love is just maybe go away for a little bit so it can get stronger. Yeah.

December 18, 2013
Hunting Text 2

Yes. My marriage is perfection. I love my husband more than a woman should.  I had no idea it was possible to love someone so much and so hard. Even when he’s sitting in his chair and he burps and he doesn’t hear me because he’s so entranced into some dumb cop show on TV […]

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Living with ridiculous insanity has led to running faster than the big dog and getting off the pot.

December 10, 2013
C and K

Once upon a time…long, long ago…my husband uttered the words: (More like about 8 months ago when he said “I do” to such ridiculous insanity with me.) “Let’s promise each other we’ll always have a fun marriage.  And we’ll laugh.  A lot.” Well, alrighty then.  Challenge accepted. I have said for years, I don’t really like […]

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With or without panties, we were going to see Chicago.

November 25, 2013
Chicago Text

1.  I got a massage. 2.  I purchased myself a nice little jug of Irish Creme. C.  I proceeded to knock back a couple of mugs of chocolate fudge flavored gourmet coffee that contained shots of said Irish Creme. 4.  I panicked and crapped. My Saturday.  November 23, 2013.  Start off with some good ol’fashioned […]

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The world has enough crap but could probably use a little more me. And a little more you. Trust me, here…I’m right.

November 19, 2013
Tame Women

Yo. Contrary to belief, I’m fairly low-key.  I tend to keep my crap to myself. Especially here.  In my little corner of the world. Because I think the world has enough bullying.  Enough shit-stirrers.  Enough politics.  Enough activism.  Enough protesting.  Enough opinions.  Enough dictating.  Enough do-it-my-way-or-else. It ain’t needed here.  You can find that shit easier […]

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I need better signs than what I get now from life even though I probably wouldn’t listen to those better signs anymore than I listen to the not-better signs now.

November 14, 2013
Weiner Dog

Me to me:  “Are you shitting me?  You were just hanging around the house and thought, “let me write some jacked up crap on my car window so I can drive through traffic and see how many honks I can get?” I honked. (Don’t look at the license plate.) (I don’t know why.  I guess […]

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Things got heated up, then Satan spoke, and that’s why there’s a disclaimer.

November 8, 2013

I could say kinda legally this is a guest posting.  But it’s kinda legally not.  It’s still me but my doctor put me on some crap to make my vajazzle do its monthly job and Dear God in heaven it’s making even me question who the hell I am this week. Or who I’m not.  This […]

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I have just proved I am not swanky enough to stay in swanky hotels because no matter where I am, my jackass-y-ness comes out. So, there.

November 5, 2013
Hotel

Here’s a surprise:  I’m travelling for work. Again. But for the last time for a few months.  I’m pooped now, but will be ready to swing back in high gear in January when it all starts up again. (I know.  You don’t care.) If you drag around with me on Facebook, you’ve already seen this. […]

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Who knew fru-fruey coffee and big burly men go together like me and a big ol’downtown city?

October 28, 2013
Fort Worth FB

Remember Green Acres?  (Lie if you have to.) That TV show from way back with Eddie Albert and Eva Gabor? Green Acres is the place to be Farm livin’ is the life for me Land spreadin’ out so far and wide Keep Manhattan, just give me that countryside New York is where I’d rather stay […]

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